Ever find yourself negotiating with your partner, your dog, or your own inner critic?
Same here.

As a real estate agent, I’m in negotiation mode daily — from buyer offers to seller repairs and everything in between. But what if I told you that how we negotiate doesn’t just impact our success… it affects our health?

Keep reading to learn how three key negotiation skills I use in real estate can actually help you feel more grounded and confident — in business and life.

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Life Is One Big Negotiation

The truth is, life itself is a constant negotiation.

Whether we’re trying to get our kid to clean their room, the dog to stop barking, the other driver to let us merge, or even convincing ourselves to get to yoga — we’re constantly putting on our negotiation caps.

Some of us are born negotiators, but most of us get better with practice. And the best part? It doesn’t have to be stressful. It can even improve our well-being!

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‍♀️ NEGOTIATION TIP #1: The Pause

When in doubt, breathe.

Early in my real estate career, a wise mentor told me:

“The most powerful negotiation tool is silence.”

Pausing in the middle of a conversation — or before replying to that seemingly provoking text — gives us space to respond instead of react. It reduces stress, increases clarity, and makes us better negotiators (and humans).

‍♀️ Try This:

• Take a breath before hitting “Send” on that next email

• Step outside and look at a tree for 60 seconds

• Move your body every 30 minutes to reset your nervous system

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 NEGOTIATION TIP #2: Active Listening

“Are you listening, or are you waiting to talk?”
This quote from a WomanUp! conference changed the way I negotiate.

In real estate — and in life — real listening builds trust. It lowers defenses and helps us reach resolution faster and with more empathy. And? It’s actually a form of stress relief.

 Bonus: Listening actively improves memory, attention, and reduces burnout.

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 NEGOTIATION TIP #3: Don’t Forget to Laugh

Yes, laughter really is the best medicine — even during a home inspection negotiation or when someone cuts us off on the freeway.

Lightening the mood during tense conversations helps ease anxiety, build rapport, and create common ground. Plus, science shows that laughter:

• Reduces stress hormones

• Improves heart health

• Boosts immunity

• Releases feel-good endorphins

So next time you’re in a high-stakes moment, see if there’s space for a smile or belly laugh.

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 CLOSING THOUGHTS

They say, “How you do one thing is how you do everything.”

By bringing pause, presence, and playfulness into our negotiations — whether we’re buying a home or navigating daily life — we create healthier, more empowered outcomes.

And if you’re planning a real estate move in Portland, you deserve a skilled, heart-centered negotiator on your side.