“Buyers are Liars” is a classic old adage of real estate. It means that buyers say one thing and do another. My reaction to this concept over the years has been, “How negative!” until most recently when Bruce and I were in the Buyers seat.
As all buyers do, we set out on our adventurous quest for a new home like a pioneer does crossing an unknown ocean. The waves of excitement, fear, excitement again, worry, attachment and loss tossed us about as we persisted towards our goal staying steady in our intentions and as open as possible to the winds of change at the same time. We created THE LIST of what we wanted, even added drawings and hung it in our kitchen so that we would see it repeatedly throughout the day.
Early on we saw a home that seemed perfect. Perfect location, remodeled, style, place for the trailer… BUT it had a huge tree in the backyard and the moment I saw the tree I was ready to leave. “NO BIG TREES especially if they shaded an area and I AM NOT CUTTING DOWN ANY BIG TREES!!!” Looking bewildered, Bruce listened to me and we left.
The Law of Reverse Effort
There is a principle called The Law of Reverse Effort. It means that what you are so desperately trying to avoid you end up attracting to you because you are placing your attention on it.
First of all, anyone who knows me at all knows that I expend an unusual amount of energy each week driving for hours to hike for even more hours to be amongst nature and yes TREES. I LOVE them. I always have and always will. But NOOOOO…. NO trees on my property!
During one week of our search, we saw 3 homes that were exciting and guess what~ they ALL had multiple trees on the property. On my weekly hike, I said to my hiking partner that we found a home that we LOVED, were going to write an offer and I realized how my “NO TREES” idea was absolutely ridiculous. I was going to get over myself and allow myself to live amongst the glorious trees!
Today we get the keys to our perfect new home. It has probably 5-7 large trees on the property and at least one of them needs cut down because it has a huge split in the middle and might fall on the house. There you have it. I am one BIG FAT LIAR OF A BUYER and a happy one at that.
The next time I hear someone say “Buyers are Liars,” I will smile wide knowing that lying means that we are all great adventurers in the vast unknown of ourselves and the best reward for our efforts is busting through those antiquated myths that we believe to be true and opening to JOY.
